FSU is another one of those schools that is renowned mostly for its football program and esteemed curriculum, a Latin word that translates roughly as “a good source of ecstasy, fake tits, and low self-esteem.” Needless to say, the football program is a disaster with boosters who wouldn’t hesitate to inject your child with tuberculosis for the opportunity to actually play again on New Year’s Day. Going to school here isn’t advancing yourself much at all, unless you consider ‘getting fraternity letters branded on your ass before working as a mortgage broker in Jacksonville’ to be an advancement.
